and you have a camera with a little heart….please come to an informational night to hear about a program that is healing families.

I am posting this on my blog because this it really is the most important time I spend using my camera. At the same time I started my photography business, I also began volunteering for families in the the Michigan area who needed bereavement photography. I know to some this sounds crazy and morbid…but I know some of you understand…but for both I share this story…

With permission from my friends Matt & Lydia, I share Finn’s story ….his short life inspired this program…

About 6 years ago, our friends moved to Toronto. Lydia was due to have her baby soon after they moved there. We were very excited to get the phone call telling us that they had baby Finn. They said he was healthy. Then we got a call saying to pray, something was seriously wrong and he was having seizures. The next phone call we received, was telling us that baby Finn was not going to make it. Matt & Lydia lost Finn within a few days of his birth.

This was a life changing experience for Matt + Lydia and many of their friends and family. When they returned to Grand Rapids, Lydia had shared so many rolls of film of she had taken in the hospital of baby Finn. I realized how invaluable and important those photos were to them. To help them remember, value, grieve, and share Finn. They were so valuable to all of us again, as we gathered on what would have been his one year birthday, to hear, share, and look at his photos. Yes, it was sad, but also freeing to grieve, and remember, Finn deserves it…he was and still is God’s child. A life to be valued.

The hospital calls us to photograph babies who are as little as 25 weeks gestational age to babies who are in the NICU, or babies who have past away just before their due date, or shortly after birth. This is not an easy place to be….

Do I cry? Almost in every session, on the ride home or later watching my own children sleeping. No matter how many I’ve done, it does not make it any easier to watch a parent lose their child. The second session I ever photographed, I was in the corner on the opposite site from where the door was because there were so many family members in the room. I was the present when the mother took her baby off life support and watched her scream as her baby died in her arms. I listened to her plead with God for her son.

I don’t know why things like this happen, but I do know that God has planned every life….and every life is created with purpose. This is why I started this program in Grand Rapids and am now the area coordinator for NILMDTS here in West Michigan….to share in each parents journey.. to validate that their child’s life and to remind them their life is valuable and worthy of remembering.

Please if you have a DSLR camera….we need your help. Spectrum Hospital L & D has 8,000 births a year, a very small number are losses, and the NICU has about 50 losses a year. We don’t photograph all of those, but we do need your help!

We have one informational meeting planned for Monday, April 18th from 7:30-9p There is no obligation to join…just come and listen to the details of the program, experiences. To actually become a volunteer photographer for NILMDTS, you need to enroll through their website, become a Spectrum volunteer, and agree to be on call one day a month, and volunteer once every 6 months. The photographers that have been helping the past few years are so valuable to our program, and I appreciate each and every one of you. But we all know we need more!!!

If you have questions about any of this, please email or call me.

I wanted to included a documentary slideshow for you. It is a family that called me that was would be delivering their baby, that because of many anomalies, she would not live more than a few hours after birth, that was if she even survived the delivery. They weren’t even monitoring the baby during labor, so no one know if this little girl would be alive when she delivered. None the less, mom wanted pictures of her baby when she was put on her chest, so I was there for the delivery. MIraclulously, she was born alive and her parents were able to spend hours with her. You will see in these photos the joy and love that these parents have for this little girl admist the grief that was to come. That is beautiful, these moments for them to remember. This is why you need to volunteer….

**CLICK HERE FOR SLIDESHOW** ~this song has impacted many of our families and photographers, it’s “Held” by Natalie Grant.

I began to wonder, how I could ever begin to comfort my daughter, if she lost a child. It’s one thing for me to experience a loss, but to watch my child, lose a child, how even more heartbreaking. As my children get older, I try to think about all the exciting things they will get to experince in their lives….but it’s also hard to cope with the fact that they will also have painful experiences, because I know they will. That is excruciating to think about…I can only pray that God will use those experiences to draw them closer to him. This brought tears to my eyes….

the song by Plumb “I am yours” played on the radio at the same time…. give it a listen.

Here are the lyrics…

your baby blues
so full of wonder
your curley cues
your contagious smile
and as i watch
you start to grow up
all I can do is hold you tight

knowing clouds will rage and
storms will race in
but you will be safe in my arms
rains will pour down
waves will crash all around
but you will be safe in my arms

story books are full of fairy tales
of kings and queens and the bluest skies
My heart is torn just in knowing
you’ll someday see the truth from lies

Castles, they might crumble
dreams may not come true
but you are never all alone
’cause I will always
always love you

Hug your kids ……value each day…